Aging isn’t for the faint of heart, but it sure comes with a lot of humor! If you’ve hit the fabulous 50s and beyond, you know that growing older is filled with wisdom, a little creakiness, and plenty of laugh-out-loud moments. I mean, you either laugh or you cry, right? I choose laughter. Well, I try. Here are 24 funny quotes about getting older that every aging woman over 50 can relate to! Growing older isn’t just inevitable—it’s entertaining.

 

 

 

24 Hilarious Quotes About Getting Older That Every Woman Over 50 Can Relate To

 

1. “I’m at that age where my back goes out more than I do.” – Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Diller nailed it—our social lives might still be thriving, but our backs seem to have other plans!

 

 

2. “You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you can do while you’re down there.” – George Burns

Efficiency is key, right? Might as well check for dust while we’re at it.

 

3. “At my age, flowers scare me.” – George Burns

Nothing like an unexpected bouquet to make you wonder if someone knows something you don’t!

 

4. “The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” – Lucille Ball

Lucille Ball had it figured out—honesty is great, but a little creative math never hurt anyone. And I fully support rounding down—especially when filling out online forms. One of the funniest quotes about women aging!

 

 

5. “Old age comes at a bad time.” – Sue Banducci

Seriously, why couldn’t it show up when we had nothing else going on?

 

6. “After 50, everything that doesn’t hurt doesn’t work.” – Unknown

A universal truth that needs no further explanation!

 

7. “I’m not aging, I’m marinating.” – Unknown

A little seasoning, a little wisdom, and a whole lot of character—what’s not to love? When it come to funny quotes about getting older, this is one of the best, probably because I heard it from a lot of the older men in my life when I was younger!

 

8. “When I was young, I was called a tomboy. Now I’m called a rugged individualist.” – Katherine Hepburn

Sounds about right! Aging just gives us fancier titles.

 

9. “The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened.” – Mark Twain

Who knew memory worked like a creative writing exercise?

 

10. “Middle age is when your classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don’t recognize you.” – Bennett Cerf

Nothing like a high school reunion to make you appreciate your hair colorist.

 

 

11. “Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.” – Jennifer Yane

One minute, we’re dancing all night; the next, we’re debating the best orthopedic shoes.

 

12. “Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.” – Mark Twain

Well, in that case, I’ve been very happy.

 

13. “I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap.” – Bob Hope

Truer words have never been spoken—naps are now a non-negotiable part of the schedule!

 

14. “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” – George Bernard Shaw

Good news! That means shopping sprees, dance parties, and silly selfies are actually anti-aging strategies.

 

15. “Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.” – Billie Burke

Cheese may improve with age, but so do women. We just require more moisturizer.

 

16. “At age 50, everyone has the face they deserve.” – George Orwell

Well, that explains all the investments in serums and night creams. More funny quotes about getting older that has some truth to it! 

 

 

17. “Middle age is when you’re sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings, and you hope it’s not for you.” – Ogden Nash

If it’s not a text, it’s not happening.

 

18. “Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.” – Jennifer Yane

One minute you’re rocking a miniskirt, the next you’re wondering if orthopedic shoes come in cute colors.

 

 

19. “I want to grow old without facelifts. I want to have the courage to be loyal to the face I have made.” – Marilyn Monroe

That said, a good skincare routine and flattering lighting never hurt.

 

20. “I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back.” – Maya Angelou

Especially unsolicited opinions about your gray hair or laugh lines.

 

21. “You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.” – George Burns

Pass the bright lipstick, put on your sassiest outfit, and keep them guessing. This isn’t just more funny quotes about getting older, it’s the flat out truth! This is what I teach here at The Middle Girls!

 

 

22. “By the time a woman realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she’s wrong.” – Unknown

The cycle of wisdom (and eye-rolling) continues.

 

 

23. “There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.” – John Mortimer

Eat the cake. Buy the shoes. Take the trip. Life’s too short for regrets!

 

24. “Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been.” – David Bowie

And let’s be real—she’s pretty fabulous.

 

Aging is a privilege, and if we can’t laugh at the absurdities of it, what’s the fun in getting older? These funny quotes about getting older remind us to embrace the journey, wrinkles and all, with a sense of humor and a whole lot of grace. After all, as women over 50, we’ve earned the right to laugh at life—especially when it includes forgetting why we walked into the kitchen in the first place.

And, it’s the best anti-aging secret there is!

Feel free to share this with a woman over 50 you know who needs a smile!

You might also like Need a Lift? Empowering Songs for Women Over 50 and Mood Booster Ideas for Older Women.

Sign up for updates and your free copy of Unlock Your Inner Strength: A Confidence Checklist for Women 50+!

Also visit my Freebies page, where everything is… well, free!

Back to the Blog for more great articles!